Mighty Careful Stepping There Boys

This week was a gong show. Everyday was an hour and a half plus drive.

Day 1 - we had a crew replant on a hellish block of stick mat and rookie trees. And then it started hailing.

Day 2 - I was working away through some crazy slash [fallen trees and other rubbish] working on my spin moves to keep speed up. Then I slipped and impaled my midsection on a pointed stick. Luckily my abs are now treeplanting abs and thus enormas so it didn't draw blood. I took a five minute break because I thought I earned it. Then I beat the mess out of that stick.

Day 3 - I was planting by myself, alone at the back of a deep walk in block. and there had been grizzly bear sightings on the block a few weeks early. And there was fresh bear poop on the road in. I spent the morning planting at the tree line, jumping at everything. OH NO! nope thats a squirrel. YIKES! nope thats a creaky tree.

Day 4 - short day finishing up that stupid block were all standing around this muddy road and someone said hey you guys should mud wrestle. Naturally I'm in. My opponent was 70 lbs heavier, had college wrestling experience and the ablitity to see while fighting. I think we called it a draw.

Day 5 - Going to a new block this one had road so badly deactivated that we had to get out and shovel and place logs so we could get across four times! only to be greeted with frozen trees and horribly rocky land.

On of those 'try again next week' weeks.

~CHAD

Prayer of the Exile

Do you ever feel reminded of a place you've never been?
Caught up dreaming of arriving there?
That this journey of life might actually be leading somewhere?
Almost as though all of our striving might take us there?

As we travel through these broken lands
Seeing the heartache and pain that saturates these souls
We cannot but wonder at talk of a place
Where all the self infliction will stop

Sometimes against our will we stay
We embrace these wretched lands as our own
And only add to the pain all around
Sinking in with the misery all around

But then we see a shadow of the unseen homeland
Hear just an echo of the drawn out celebration
Which wets our appetite for things barely known
Heightening our imaginations for what we cannot reach

We are privileged beyond measure
For the Master of that land has called us there
The land where the broken is restored
Where all pains are made right

But we must walk and war our way there
And flee the sorrow that smells so sweet
That path is narrow and steep
But the Master Himself will lead us there.

~CHAD

Keeping on Grinding

Well here goes another weeks worth of unscripted stuff that will get blurted out on to the Internet.

This was a really hard week. Everyday we had over an hour and a half to drive to the block which leaves less time to work and the land got harder everyday. Really did a good job of grinding me right out emotionally. Still not sure how to explain this properly because when I try to explain it or talk about it is really seems so minor. I guess the volume on life gets turned up with I'm alone trying to motivate myself to work harder in harder conditions. This day off is really nice though, timely even, not sure I could have taken another day like yesterday.

I plan to spend the rest of the day working on a poem called "Prayer of the Exile." I'm playing on it being long and good which is a sharp shift from most of the poems I write. Hopefully I will have that up for you all next week.

Also I'm disappointed no one took up my Isaiah 58 challenge. Seriously people comments and discussion will keep my blogging.

My book on the Jewishness of Jesus, talked about how Jews in Jesus' day would continually thank God for EVERYTHING. like start the day with thanking God that their souls returned to their bodies, which was quickly followed by a prayer of thankfulness that God restored sight to the blind. All their prayers started with something like "Blessed are you, O LORD our God, King of the Universe." So I've been working on adapting this posture of thankfulness in my own life thank God for little things, like seeing a snowy mountain the distance, having a warm sleeping bag, even having a job even when I'm not thrilled with it. But being a 'theological imperialist' I've adapted the first like of these two line prayers to "Praise Jesus, Author, Redeemer and King...."

Serious?

This morning I woke up to three inches of heavy, wet BC snow on top of my tent. That's right on May 19 we had a huge dump of snow, bigger than any I got to enjoy this winter. Ok well Three Hills has a really light winter but I thought for sure I was in the clear when I got out here. Ice is one thing but mounds of snow is another. So people with less quality tent got the rude awakening of tent tent collapsing. Seems my new MEC tent is made of tougher stuff, now to see if she floods when all the snow melts. It's gotta go some where I just hope not in my tent.

Planting continues to go well. Our crew has good moral and even though we compete we are really good natured about it and encourage each other.

Were not planting today not only because of the blizzard but because we somehow ran out of trees and had to take two days off. Today being the second. I wonder if it will be warm enough to melt all the snow so we can plant tomorrow.

As I've been doing my daily Bible read I came across Isaiah 58 which really stood out to me. It talks about seeking God for you own sake and not for His own sake. But its in the prophetic books so it is a bit complicated and requires a bit more study on my part. But hey give it a read and leave comment and we'll discuss it next week.

~CHAD

Oh yea this again.

I may have made the comment that Treeplanting is just like war. Or that was what I was gearing up for mentally. But honestly its nothing like war. War is usually compared with extended periods of boredom with moments of sheer terror. Oddly enough I've heard truck driving described the same way. But planting is like nothing else. I spent the last nine months trying and failing miserably to explain what it is like. So much that I think I lost a real concept of what is like.

So after dreading it for a while and getting here and being grumpy about it, when I got on the block it hit me. Oh yea this is what I do during the summer. Makes perfect sense. So I had two days of going slow and finding rhythm, followed by a day of experiencing the full spectrum of emotions.(always a whirlwind) which was followed my me hitting a new level in my abilities treeplanting and I actually was the top planter the last two days. I have never highballed before, but suddenly I found a new level of determination and got faster. I'm still coming to terms with this new identity that I could be the best planter on a crew with eight vets.

Your probably wondering is it cold out there. Well the answer is yes. today I woke up and my tent was covered in ice from the weird snow rain action of the last night. and I'm set up on a hill because all the good spots were taken by the time I got to our gravel pit of a campsite. But I've endured worse. Hopefully my body is up for the challenge that my mind is now ready to go for.

On a spiritual note. In reading the psalms I keep coming across great spiritual ideas that are really hard to integrate. What does it really mean to wait upon the Lord. Clearly not sitting in a corner doing nothing. And how does one rest in the Lord, assuming that we define rest as something other than sleep. Ps 131 talks about how the psalmist has calmed and quieted his soul. I think this is a key to understanding these ideas. while not an eat Cheerios kind of decision. Resting and waiting IN the Lord are lifestyle defining ideals. In that worship Jesus with all our lives and leaning into Him as our strength and life giving spiritual support we find true life. Not that I have found that. Or that I know a six step plan. But its a dream and daily Bible reading has been great in prompting me towards that.

~CHAD

Reading List

So as I'm slowing packing up all my junk, worried sick I'll forget something important, I though you all might like to know what I'm hoping to read this summer. So here is my summer reading list, in addition to my daily Bible reading.

Convergence - Spiritual Journeys of a Charismatic Calvinist by Sam Storms
Orthodoxy by G.K. Chesterton
Sitting at the Feet of Rabbi Jesus - How the Jewishness of Jesus Can Transform Your Faith by Ann Spangler and Lois Tverberg
Can You Hear Me? - Tuning in to the God who speaks by Brad Jersak
Dark Night of the Soul by St. John of the Cross

And the last two are more for a literary break than spiritual growth

Don't Be That Guy - A collection of 60 annoying guys we all know and wish we didn't by Colin Nissan, illustrated by Sean Farrell
The Symbol Detective - How to Decipher Mystical Motifs-and Know Where to Find Them by Tony Allan

Most guys see treeplanting as a relief from reading books so I have to read a lot just to balance out the average of nothing. I also am intent on not wasting my time in the bush.

I leave for Prince George tomorrow at noon. I am so tired of sitting around. I'm so ready to go bang some trees in the ground.

Check back for continued updates on my adventures, spiritual musings, and humiliating episodes!

WAR!

Here I am staring down the barrel of what I expect to be the hardest year of my life. With another season of treeplanting starting at the end of the week. [see previous blog posts for how much fun that is] And with no firm idea for what will happen after that. But I loaded with conviction that I need to set up my life better. I seem to be getting new opportunities to restart life every four months. Maybe my subconscious need for change is rooted in my rank fear of boredom.

Another note only leaving for Prince George on May 7 left me with more than two weeks off, which was way to long to not have things to accomplish.

I do think this season will be good, devastatingly hard but good. My chief goals are to plant 100,000 trees and learn how to pray. Here I go leaving my city, leaving my girl. Here goes. In the words of some solider from some war movie I probably didn't see....

"BRING THE RAIN!"